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pumpkinhollow ([personal profile] pumpkinhollow) wrote2000-02-08 08:52 pm

TDM #4 - Aurora Borealis Bust? [REPRINT]

Pumpkin Hollow Gazette February Issue


[Find our plain text version here!]



Pumpkin Hollow Gazette

2/8/24 | TDM #4 - AURORA BOREALIS BLITZ BUST? Content Warnings: "Further Details" section has independent CW labels.
Forecast: SEVERE BLIZZARD WARNING

REBUILDING HELP REQUESTED

By Cecil Gershwin Palmer

The image?

A photo taken of the damage.

ACROSS PUMPKIN HOLLOW - City government is requesting aid with repairs to public buildings and local fixtures after the recent earthquakes on Tuesday, January 8th. While there was minimal damage to Town Hall itself, several important buildings sustained damage, including the Magpie National Bank, the South Train Station and the Clock Tower, which is now stuck with hands at 8pm.

Regarding the cause of the earthquake, local biologist Dr. Elias Coldwood was heard to say “There's never been seismic activity here.” And he’s a scientist, so he would know! But clearly this is no longer the case. Perhaps Pumpkin Hollow has a mysterious tiny civilization underground worshiping a destroyer god, planning to attack through the bowling alley, the moment we create a bowling alley. Perhaps not. More on this story as it unfolds, faithful readers.

In the meantime, volunteers to help with the damage to city buildings are invited to meet with Mayor Hellen Poe for assignments.

AURORA TURNS VIOLENT - MYSTERIOUS BLIZZARD INTERRUPTS CHAOS

By Yorick Aberdeen

The image?

An artist's rendition of last year's view.

ABOVE MARROW ISLE - Despite our earlier report, it turns out that this year's annual aurora borealis season did not turn out to be a pleasant or romantic viewing experience. Instead, starry monsters based off of classic constellations have been attacking the town each time the aurora is in the sky! However, due to some extreme blizzards that have been occurring most nights each month since late January, the aurora has been interrupted more nights than not and the monsters intercepted. Still, the Pumpkin Hollow Safety Board would like to remind everyone to take appropriate precautions during inclement weather, and to tread carefully on clear nights as monsters may still be attacking until late February!

HOROSCOPES

By Cecil Gershwin Palmer

The image?

What do the stars say about you today?

Capricorn: Do you feel as if you’ve lost something? If not, it’s wise to double-check. Perhaps it’s not something like a button or a key, but your sense of wonder or your self-confidence. Remember, things tend to be in the last place you look.

Aquarius: Something about the year ending made you feel lighter, like taking off a heavy wool coat. Ride this burst of energy as far as it will take you, because the shiny of a fresh beginning tends to wear off quickly.

Pisces: Don’t worry, I don’t believe what everyone says behind your back. You’re not too sensitive or too naive. They’re just jealous. Really, most of the time when they’re whispering, it’s not even about you.

Aries: You’re the sort of warm individual that babies and animals are drawn to. Unfortunately, this may include hungry wolves and swarms of insects. But don’t let that bring you down! We need that sort of personality around here.

Taurus: There’s nothing wrong with wanting to be the best, until you work to stop others from also being the best. That’s called cheating and may lead to you being disqualified from competitions. If you get caught, that is.

Gemini: You know those riddles about the two guards, one who always tells the truth and one who always lies? Well, everyone hates those riddles with a passion. You’ll see for yourself, soon.

Cancer: Wouldn’t you like to know?

Leo: Your incandescent personality often makes you the center of attention. However, that’s not the only thing about you that glows. Moths may flock to you in the dark this week, and so might children afraid to sleep with the lights out.

Virgo: Be careful with your words–they aren’t just the precursors to your deeds, but the manifestation of your will. This is not a week for idioms and metaphors, not for you. Even something like bemoaning a lack of spoons may make eating cereal harder.

Libra: You are, inevitably, the first one heard to say a situation isn’t fair. And it’s not, nor will it ever be. Instead of getting upset, have you ever considered getting revenge? That’s usually more satisfying in the long run.

Scorpio: Ugh, Scorpios. The position of Venus means your usually volatile emotions will be in the doldrums instead. Enjoy this while it lasts I guess. Who knows if you’ll ever experience such peace again, given, well. You’re kind of an emotional mess and no one likes you.

Sagittarius: There will never be another day like today. You must strive to make the day everything you want it to be. No mistakes, now! Consider your choices very carefully. Consider your choice to consider, very carefully.

SUNFIRE'S HEARTH

By Yorick Aberdeen

The image?

A photo of Mayor Poe's cats, Toffee and Butter, enjoying the view.

ASSORTED LOCATIONS - As the coldest part of the year settles over our fair isle, it is time for Sunfire’s Hearth--- an informal celebration of bonfires and hearth flames, for those unfamiliar! For the months of January and February, a raised platform for bonfires will be lit on weekends, and restaurants and taverns across town will keep their fireplaces lit. Unlike many of our other festivities, there is no structured celebration--- simply make some time during this time to bask in the warmth of a fire! You can even celebrate at home.

An additional benefit of this time of year is that Merrymeet is well on its way. So take this time and get snuggly in front of a fire with your special person to get in the mood for romance! (Or they could be platonic snuggles. Whatever suits you best.)

LOCAL ALCHEMIST REPORTS MISSING POTION

By Yorick Aberdeen

The image?

Some of Mx. Sallek's usual stock. Could stand to have better labels./p>

LOCATION UNCERTAIN - Early Monday morning, local alchemist Aeryn Sallek reported that a large container of magical potion has been swapped with another, and it would seem that the mistaken jug has been sent out for delivery. According to Mx. Sallek, they sent a number of jugs out for delivery in a case with our local delivery extraordinaire, Sam Porter Bridges. The jugs were meant to contain a harmless, potable freeze-resistance potion for our town’s various water sources, in the interest of keeping water reserves drinkable in sub-freezing winter weather. However, when they returned to the shop, one of these potions remained on their counter while a love potion they’d been working on went missing.

“‘Love potion’ is kind of a misnomer, honestly,” Mx. Sallek is quoted to have said on the matter. “But ‘emotional acuity’ potion doesn’t quite roll off the tongue. Basically what it actually does is enhance existing romantic desire and embolden the user to be emotionally open. But Yorick should already know all this, since he’s the one who ordered it.” [Editing note: don’t forget to cut the last part of that comment before publishing. Cecil, you don’t need to include personal statements directed at reporters from these interviews!]

It’s unclear which area of town this particular potion ended up being injected into the water source, but according to Mx. Sallek, the potion was not particularly intense to begin with. It should be significantly diluted as to be harmless. Still, if you notice any strange symptoms such as butterflies in your stomach, a desire to burst into song, or inexplicable yearning, please file a report with the Safety Board at your earliest convenience.

FOOD SHORTAGES PUT STRAIN ON ISLAND ECONOMY

By Yorick Aberdeen

MARKET DISTRICT - While there are many things to celebrate this time of year, Marrow Isle is not without its adversity. Over these past months, many new members of our community have arrived by ferry after our numbers remained small and stagnant for many years. And the presence of our newfound neighbors has been a boon to all of us. Many artisans have opened useful businesses, medical professionals have expanded our access to healthcare, and a new fishing vessel has taken to the seas. However, despite a few additions, our farming community remains quite modest and planting was not planned with such incredible new growth in mind.

The unfortunate result of this is that food reserves on the island this year are uncharacteristically low. As such, Town Council has made the difficult decision to allow for the temporary inflation of food prices and the rationing of food staples.

“We understand the hardship this will place on the residents of Pumpkin Hollow,” said Mayor Poe in a statement after this decision was made. “But please know that we are all in this together. We hope to be able to offer a better incentive package for those interested in farming in the coming springtime.”

Page 1





Further Details...


Aurora


The dead of winter sheds all colors of the trees and flowers across Marrow Isle, but tonight, there are no stark whites and grays and browns.



Tonight, in the sky sprawling with stars above the dreary town, there are lights.



Sprawling trails of violet and green twist and wave through the sky, brightening the earth below and the sea beyond Jack's Marina in magical colors. The return of the borealis is something many Pumpkin Hollowites look forward to, and their reactions are very clear: people scurry down to the shores to watch with wide eyes, many retrieve telescopes, and some even borrow the decks of ships, abandoned for the night at the docks, to watch the sights.



It doesn't take long for this to change, however; the sea nor land are safe from the curse, and it's made quickly apparent that the sky is no exception.



At first, the sight seems like none more than an illusion, perhaps someone blinking and missing a strange shift of the lights. A glimmering outline forms around a cluster of stars, only slightly harder than any of the lines that define the aurora's rays. Several of these shapes form, each array of stars different from the last, some larger, some smaller.



And then, the stars begin to fall.



Seeming to peel off the painted sky, the ebbing colors surrounding the starlight drop, crashing to the world below. Some fall to the streets and beaches, while others fall into the forest, leaving view, or drop into the sea, leaving splashes and waves in their wake that ensure any watching knows full and well that this is not a trick of the light. At first, these shapes are unmoving, glowing masses of aurora-light with stars shining brightly within them. Most townsfolk are uneasy, but this seems to pale in severity to the other disasters, even if they lack any idea of what it could mean for them.



That is, of course, until the masses begin to move.



Each one is as varied as the constellation it stole from the sky: stars form suggestions of skeletal structures, and their "flesh", only consisting of swimming lights and liquid sky that steals any lights around them. Two identical glowing shapes rise to a face finally taking form, and slowly, moving more like gel than animal as it rises to freshly-formed legs, it settles on the closest living thing it can find.



There is no calculation in it, nor what seems to be a glimmer of thought.



It simply lunges with intent to kill.





Horoscopes
[CW: Altered emotional states ]


Cecil’s disconcerting horoscopes have the following effects for the next few days:


  • Capricorn: misplaced things, particularly small objects


  • Aquarius: zoomies!


  • Pisces: intense paranoia


  • Aries: Disney princess-like magnetism to local fauna


  • Taurus: insatiable perfectionism


  • Gemini: reversed truth values; lies come out honest, being honest sounds like a lie.


  • Cancer: Pandora-esque curiosity, to the point of personal detriment


  • Leo: radiant glow emanating from your person


  • Virgo: figurative speech is manifested into the world with its literal meaning


  • Libra: a particularly potent desire for revenge


  • Scorpio: numbing of emotions (can be counteracted by love potion, partially)


  • Sagittarius: incapacitating indecision

(Don’t know your character’s sign? Feel free to just decide on one!)




Love Potion
[CW: Altered Emotional States ]


Unbeknownst to the townsfolk, the “love” potion ended up in the water supply of the Oak & Iron. As promised by Aeryn, it is thoroughly diluted, as its recipients believed it to be a normal freeze-resistance potion to be mixed with their water.


The effects are not particularly intense. However, anyone who drinks any of the tavern’s housemade ale or cider, drinks the coffee, or eats any food that might require water to cook will experience symptoms of “emotional acuity”. This involves feeling more emotionally open, more receptive to positive feelings about others, a strong desire for physical or verbal affection, and the intensification of romantic or sexual attraction that you might already be experiencing. It will last about half a day. Just in time to help potentially land you a date for Merrymeet, a flower and fertility festival in early spring!






Famine
[CW: Starvation and food scarcity ]


Food rationing and inflation will have the following impact:



Grocery budgets for apped-in characters will be reduced in their efficacy.
Basic groceries will be only the most minimal of staples. You will likely go hungry if you do not find a way to supplement this.
Bountiful groceries will be reduced to the amount of food normally contained in basic.
Lavish groceries will not be available at all.
Your grocery choices from Activity Check are not able to be modified for this month unless otherwise stated.



Bonuses and Discounts associated with the Farmer and Fisherman jobs are also reduced.
Level 1 bonuses will be reduced to standard, which is to say how they would function for a non-Farmer/Fisherman character during a normal, pre-famine month. (ex. Whereas normally a Level 1 Farmer would get free Basic groceries, they will now have to pay the 50 Brass, but do not have the efficacy of Basic groceries reduced as described above.)
Level 2 bonuses will be reduced to that of a Level 1 Farmer/Fisherman. (ex. Whereas a Level 2 Fisherman would normally be able to have Bountiful groceries discounted to 50 Brass, they now must pay full price for Bountiful groceries. However, they can still get Basic groceries for free and don’t suffer from the famine induced efficacy reduction for either budget.)



Oak & Iron Residents will only be able to receive bland, repetitive meals with their food vouchers consisting of simple broth, plain bread, bland potato dishes, and the like. It is enough to be fed and comfortable but it is incredibly unsatisfying. (This includes all new characters that are not apped-in.) Drinks, however, are still plentiful.



Characters who do not eat will find that their respective sources of fuel will be reduced to just barely enough to keep them functional, provided that they ration carefully. (Ex. Transformers may want to be less active. Vampires will find that victims cannot handle excessive blood loss without fainting and generally prefer to stay home.)



Characters who were present to fight the Mother Crab back in late summer and chose to can some of their crab can use it now!



Hunting, foraging, and fishing can help reduce the impact of these reductions, and people can share their food. You can absolutely die of starvation. After Merrymeet in February, food will return to normal.



batteryacid: from the Matlock episode "The Star" (I)

[personal profile] batteryacid 2024-02-09 06:05 am (UTC)(link)
Eddie's heard of foxes in the henhouse, but a (sort of) wolf? Once he gets a good look at what's causing the fuss, he rests his wooden club on one shoulder and says dryly,

"Agent Jean, I'd guess that Bobbin thinks you're trying to take her eggs ahead of schedule."
restingslasherface: (pic#16454871)

[personal profile] restingslasherface 2024-02-09 06:07 am (UTC)(link)
Their voice is - well, subdued isn't the right word. They sound happy? Probably? But the manic energy is just gone. The wine has done what death, destruction, grief, and direct orders from superiors in the workplace couldn't: taught Jean some volume control. To wit:

"She's doing a good job. She must be paid. In love. She is a good chicken, comrade Eddie - I never made it to the front door did I? Ha! Haha...sorry, came to drop by and then the chickens. The underpaid chickens..."

They're gonna get pecked again.
batteryacid: (E)

[personal profile] batteryacid 2024-02-09 06:42 am (UTC)(link)
"Jean." Eddie says, more sharply this time, "She's telling you 'no'. You can give her a snuggle when she's actually in the mood, and less likely to bite off a finger."

Then, catching sight of that wine bottle, Eddie asks in a gentler voice, "Have you been drinking?"
restingslasherface: (pic#16839944)

[personal profile] restingslasherface 2024-02-09 06:50 am (UTC)(link)
The Sadness, but Jean puts their faintly-bleeding hand in their lap. "That I have, Comrade. That I have. And in my drinking I had a thought, and I came here to think it at you, but then the chickens...they're related to the thought but! They cannot discourse."
batteryacid: (E)

[personal profile] batteryacid 2024-02-09 06:57 am (UTC)(link)
"How about you come inside? I can toast some bread, we've got jam... get you a snack to soak up some of that alcohol. I bet by the time we... finish our discourse... Bobbin might be willing to be petted. Or Thread will be."

Eddie has been sidling into the coop as he speaks, and offers a hand to help Jean up once he finishes the suggestion.
restingslasherface: (pic#16454871)

[personal profile] restingslasherface 2024-02-09 06:44 pm (UTC)(link)
"...Okayyy...."

Jean takes the hand and follows Eddie out, gathering up their canteen and the wine, then their suit. They uh. They do not put on the suit. They walk their socked feet through the snowy ground into the house, wincing visibly at the Wet Sock Feeling (patent pending) but not, as it were, seemingly connecting any of the dots. Right now they have exactly two thoughts, one of which is the proposed Discourse, and the other of which is elevator music.

It is not, however, difficult to get Jean in front of the fire or to encourage them to remove the wet socks. There is a Moment when they realize something, which sends them into the kitchen with their canteen; they slosh it a few times, nod Sagely, and then add water to it before sitting back down next to the fire and working on opening the wine bottle again.
batteryacid: (E)

[personal profile] batteryacid 2024-02-10 06:55 pm (UTC)(link)
Eddie notices the lack of shoes but does not say anything that will delay Jean from getting inside. Pick your battles, and all that.

Eddie is slicing bread to toast in the oven, and raises an eyebrow at Jean watering down whatever's in the canteen. Still no protest, not just yet. The material help, the promise of food, ought to be fulfilled first.

"All right, here we go," Eddie says, carrying in a plate stacked with warm toasted bread. He has a second plate that has two butter knives, a stick of softened butter, and a jar of berry jam. "Don't feel shy about eating and talking, Jean. So what brings you to my farm?"
restingslasherface: (pic#16454871)

[personal profile] restingslasherface 2024-02-14 04:46 pm (UTC)(link)
Jean pours just a bit of the wine into the canteen, screws it shut, and shakes vigorously. The food will be considered in a moment.

"I was thinking about the chickens," Jean admits (they are STILL shaking the canteen). "Or, well, livestock in general! In many ways they're your fellow professionals, yes? They assist you in your work. Excepting perhaps Bobbin who keeps trying to encourage a career change into burglary. I know they're not...you know..." shake shake shake shake shake shake, "...they can't be employees, I do know that! They aren't smart. And I think. That's what I'm getting at?"

"...We ask their lives of them, hahahaha, ha...we do, though. We. We raise them and love them and then we take their lives. About halfway into this bottle I realized that I'm at peace with that? Sort of? But I thought, I thought, perhaps Eddie can help shine some light on the, the relationship here."
batteryacid: (E)

[personal profile] batteryacid 2024-02-15 11:36 am (UTC)(link)
"There's another farm up the way that decided to kill their chickens -- and I think it was last week that they slaughtered the last one," Eddie says. "To them, the meat was more valuable to sustain themselves. And when springtime comes, they'll probably come here and ask me to sell them a couple chicks."

He shrugs. "It's not what I would have done. It's not what I'm doing, obviously. But I'm not going to refuse their business if they come to me. Some people do raise and love their animals, and would be very emotional if they were forced to choose -- kill and eat this chicken or goat to survive, or starve? And for others... there's no conflict. The animal isn't sapient, and people are. The survival of a person is worth more than an animal."

Eddie rests his chin on his hand and contemplates Jean for a moment. "Does that make sense?"
restingslasherface: (pic#16839944)

[personal profile] restingslasherface 2024-02-24 02:44 am (UTC)(link)
"It does, but I...am expressing myself poorly, I think, forgive me a moment."

Aaaaaaaaaaand they're chugging the watered wine. Like. A lot.

"I mean more -" wiping their mouth, "- more...more that it ends that way no matter what, yes? At some point, Thread and Bobbin will be slain to feed us; it is the culmination of their purpose, the fulfillment of the pact between man and beast."
batteryacid: (Default)

[personal profile] batteryacid 2024-03-07 12:57 am (UTC)(link)
"That's true. But everything dies," (and that's a fact) Eddie says quietly. "Hell, with the Pine Devil here, everything can get eaten eventually."

He lapses into quiet thought for a while. "Chickens can live up to ten years. Twelve, I think, if they're really healthy. It will be a while yet. I'm thinking of staying, even after we solve the mystery and problem of the barrier, but... I didn't get the impression that you would?"
Edited (Vonn can you code properly for ONE goddamn tag??) 2024-03-07 00:58 (UTC)
restingslasherface: (pic#16839944)

[personal profile] restingslasherface 2024-03-09 04:36 am (UTC)(link)
"No," Jean agrees, getting a dreamy smile. "Captain Zelda would like me to go with her, to a better world. One in need of a warrior, but...with the promise of peace..."
batteryacid: from the Matlock episode "The Star" (B)

[personal profile] batteryacid 2024-03-11 04:17 am (UTC)(link)
Eddie gives Jean a genuine smile. "I'm glad to hear it!"
restingslasherface: (pic#16839944)

Hrm. Possibly wrap if only for the sake of trying to beat my inbox down?

[personal profile] restingslasherface 2024-03-15 05:29 pm (UTC)(link)
"So am I," Jean agrees a little distantly. "...Comrade I think I might be sleepy."

'Might be'. The wine's finally beating them, the war has been long.
batteryacid: (Default)

wrap

[personal profile] batteryacid 2024-03-15 05:49 pm (UTC)(link)
Jean will wake up later, after wine-sleepy, having been tucked into the guest bedroom's bed by Eddie.

At least the guest bedroom is getting some use.