TDM #4 - Aurora Borealis Bust? [REPRINT]

[pumpkinhollow]

Pumpkin Hollow Gazette February Issue

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Pumpkin Hollow Gazette

2/8/24 | TDM #4 - AURORA BOREALIS BLITZ BUST? Content Warnings: "Further Details" section has independent CW labels.
Forecast: SEVERE BLIZZARD WARNING

REBUILDING HELP REQUESTED

By Cecil Gershwin Palmer

A photo taken of the damage.

ACROSS PUMPKIN HOLLOW - City government is requesting aid with repairs to public buildings and local fixtures after the recent earthquakes on Tuesday, January 8th. While there was minimal damage to Town Hall itself, several important buildings sustained damage, including the Magpie National Bank, the South Train Station and the Clock Tower, which is now stuck with hands at 8pm.

Regarding the cause of the earthquake, local biologist Dr. Elias Coldwood was heard to say “There's never been seismic activity here.” And he’s a scientist, so he would know! But clearly this is no longer the case. Perhaps Pumpkin Hollow has a mysterious tiny civilization underground worshiping a destroyer god, planning to attack through the bowling alley, the moment we create a bowling alley. Perhaps not. More on this story as it unfolds, faithful readers.

In the meantime, volunteers to help with the damage to city buildings are invited to meet with Mayor Hellen Poe for assignments.

AURORA TURNS VIOLENT - MYSTERIOUS BLIZZARD INTERRUPTS CHAOS

By Yorick Aberdeen

An artist's rendition of last year's view.

ABOVE MARROW ISLE - Despite our earlier report, it turns out that this year's annual aurora borealis season did not turn out to be a pleasant or romantic viewing experience. Instead, starry monsters based off of classic constellations have been attacking the town each time the aurora is in the sky! However, due to some extreme blizzards that have been occurring most nights each month since late January, the aurora has been interrupted more nights than not and the monsters intercepted. Still, the Pumpkin Hollow Safety Board would like to remind everyone to take appropriate precautions during inclement weather, and to tread carefully on clear nights as monsters may still be attacking until late February!

HOROSCOPES

By Cecil Gershwin Palmer

What do the stars say about you today?

Capricorn: Do you feel as if you’ve lost something? If not, it’s wise to double-check. Perhaps it’s not something like a button or a key, but your sense of wonder or your self-confidence. Remember, things tend to be in the last place you look.

Aquarius: Something about the year ending made you feel lighter, like taking off a heavy wool coat. Ride this burst of energy as far as it will take you, because the shiny of a fresh beginning tends to wear off quickly.

Pisces: Don’t worry, I don’t believe what everyone says behind your back. You’re not too sensitive or too naive. They’re just jealous. Really, most of the time when they’re whispering, it’s not even about you.

Aries: You’re the sort of warm individual that babies and animals are drawn to. Unfortunately, this may include hungry wolves and swarms of insects. But don’t let that bring you down! We need that sort of personality around here.

Taurus: There’s nothing wrong with wanting to be the best, until you work to stop others from also being the best. That’s called cheating and may lead to you being disqualified from competitions. If you get caught, that is.

Gemini: You know those riddles about the two guards, one who always tells the truth and one who always lies? Well, everyone hates those riddles with a passion. You’ll see for yourself, soon.

Cancer: Wouldn’t you like to know?

Leo: Your incandescent personality often makes you the center of attention. However, that’s not the only thing about you that glows. Moths may flock to you in the dark this week, and so might children afraid to sleep with the lights out.

Virgo: Be careful with your words–they aren’t just the precursors to your deeds, but the manifestation of your will. This is not a week for idioms and metaphors, not for you. Even something like bemoaning a lack of spoons may make eating cereal harder.

Libra: You are, inevitably, the first one heard to say a situation isn’t fair. And it’s not, nor will it ever be. Instead of getting upset, have you ever considered getting revenge? That’s usually more satisfying in the long run.

Scorpio: Ugh, Scorpios. The position of Venus means your usually volatile emotions will be in the doldrums instead. Enjoy this while it lasts I guess. Who knows if you’ll ever experience such peace again, given, well. You’re kind of an emotional mess and no one likes you.

Sagittarius: There will never be another day like today. You must strive to make the day everything you want it to be. No mistakes, now! Consider your choices very carefully. Consider your choice to consider, very carefully.

SUNFIRE'S HEARTH

By Yorick Aberdeen

A photo of Mayor Poe's cats, Toffee and Butter, enjoying the view.

ASSORTED LOCATIONS - As the coldest part of the year settles over our fair isle, it is time for Sunfire’s Hearth--- an informal celebration of bonfires and hearth flames, for those unfamiliar! For the months of January and February, a raised platform for bonfires will be lit on weekends, and restaurants and taverns across town will keep their fireplaces lit. Unlike many of our other festivities, there is no structured celebration--- simply make some time during this time to bask in the warmth of a fire! You can even celebrate at home.

An additional benefit of this time of year is that Merrymeet is well on its way. So take this time and get snuggly in front of a fire with your special person to get in the mood for romance! (Or they could be platonic snuggles. Whatever suits you best.)

LOCAL ALCHEMIST REPORTS MISSING POTION

By Yorick Aberdeen

Some of Mx. Sallek's usual stock. Could stand to have better labels./p>

LOCATION UNCERTAIN - Early Monday morning, local alchemist Aeryn Sallek reported that a large container of magical potion has been swapped with another, and it would seem that the mistaken jug has been sent out for delivery. According to Mx. Sallek, they sent a number of jugs out for delivery in a case with our local delivery extraordinaire, Sam Porter Bridges. The jugs were meant to contain a harmless, potable freeze-resistance potion for our town’s various water sources, in the interest of keeping water reserves drinkable in sub-freezing winter weather. However, when they returned to the shop, one of these potions remained on their counter while a love potion they’d been working on went missing.

“‘Love potion’ is kind of a misnomer, honestly,” Mx. Sallek is quoted to have said on the matter. “But ‘emotional acuity’ potion doesn’t quite roll off the tongue. Basically what it actually does is enhance existing romantic desire and embolden the user to be emotionally open. But Yorick should already know all this, since he’s the one who ordered it.” [Editing note: don’t forget to cut the last part of that comment before publishing. Cecil, you don’t need to include personal statements directed at reporters from these interviews!]

It’s unclear which area of town this particular potion ended up being injected into the water source, but according to Mx. Sallek, the potion was not particularly intense to begin with. It should be significantly diluted as to be harmless. Still, if you notice any strange symptoms such as butterflies in your stomach, a desire to burst into song, or inexplicable yearning, please file a report with the Safety Board at your earliest convenience.

FOOD SHORTAGES PUT STRAIN ON ISLAND ECONOMY

By Yorick Aberdeen

MARKET DISTRICT - While there are many things to celebrate this time of year, Marrow Isle is not without its adversity. Over these past months, many new members of our community have arrived by ferry after our numbers remained small and stagnant for many years. And the presence of our newfound neighbors has been a boon to all of us. Many artisans have opened useful businesses, medical professionals have expanded our access to healthcare, and a new fishing vessel has taken to the seas. However, despite a few additions, our farming community remains quite modest and planting was not planned with such incredible new growth in mind.

The unfortunate result of this is that food reserves on the island this year are uncharacteristically low. As such, Town Council has made the difficult decision to allow for the temporary inflation of food prices and the rationing of food staples.

“We understand the hardship this will place on the residents of Pumpkin Hollow,” said Mayor Poe in a statement after this decision was made. “But please know that we are all in this together. We hope to be able to offer a better incentive package for those interested in farming in the coming springtime.”

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Further Details...

Aurora

The dead of winter sheds all colors of the trees and flowers across Marrow Isle, but tonight, there are no stark whites and grays and browns.

Tonight, in the sky sprawling with stars above the dreary town, there are lights.

Sprawling trails of violet and green twist and wave through the sky, brightening the earth below and the sea beyond Jack's Marina in magical colors. The return of the borealis is something many Pumpkin Hollowites look forward to, and their reactions are very clear: people scurry down to the shores to watch with wide eyes, many retrieve telescopes, and some even borrow the decks of ships, abandoned for the night at the docks, to watch the sights.

It doesn't take long for this to change, however; the sea nor land are safe from the curse, and it's made quickly apparent that the sky is no exception.

At first, the sight seems like none more than an illusion, perhaps someone blinking and missing a strange shift of the lights. A glimmering outline forms around a cluster of stars, only slightly harder than any of the lines that define the aurora's rays. Several of these shapes form, each array of stars different from the last, some larger, some smaller.

And then, the stars begin to fall.

Seeming to peel off the painted sky, the ebbing colors surrounding the starlight drop, crashing to the world below. Some fall to the streets and beaches, while others fall into the forest, leaving view, or drop into the sea, leaving splashes and waves in their wake that ensure any watching knows full and well that this is not a trick of the light. At first, these shapes are unmoving, glowing masses of aurora-light with stars shining brightly within them. Most townsfolk are uneasy, but this seems to pale in severity to the other disasters, even if they lack any idea of what it could mean for them.

That is, of course, until the masses begin to move.

Each one is as varied as the constellation it stole from the sky: stars form suggestions of skeletal structures, and their "flesh", only consisting of swimming lights and liquid sky that steals any lights around them. Two identical glowing shapes rise to a face finally taking form, and slowly, moving more like gel than animal as it rises to freshly-formed legs, it settles on the closest living thing it can find.

There is no calculation in it, nor what seems to be a glimmer of thought.

It simply lunges with intent to kill.

Horoscopes
[CW: Altered emotional states ]

Cecil’s disconcerting horoscopes have the following effects for the next few days:

• Capricorn: misplaced things, particularly small objects



• Aquarius: zoomies!



• Pisces: intense paranoia



• Aries: Disney princess-like magnetism to local fauna



• Taurus: insatiable perfectionism



• Gemini: reversed truth values; lies come out honest, being honest sounds like a lie.



• Cancer: Pandora-esque curiosity, to the point of personal detriment



• Leo: radiant glow emanating from your person



• Virgo: figurative speech is manifested into the world with its literal meaning



• Libra: a particularly potent desire for revenge



• Scorpio: numbing of emotions (can be counteracted by love potion, partially)



• Sagittarius: incapacitating indecision

(Don’t know your character’s sign? Feel free to just decide on one!)

Love Potion
[CW: Altered Emotional States ]

Unbeknownst to the townsfolk, the “love” potion ended up in the water supply of the Oak & Iron. As promised by Aeryn, it is thoroughly diluted, as its recipients believed it to be a normal freeze-resistance potion to be mixed with their water.

The effects are not particularly intense. However, anyone who drinks any of the tavern’s housemade ale or cider, drinks the coffee, or eats any food that might require water to cook will experience symptoms of “emotional acuity”. This involves feeling more emotionally open, more receptive to positive feelings about others, a strong desire for physical or verbal affection, and the intensification of romantic or sexual attraction that you might already be experiencing. It will last about half a day. Just in time to help potentially land you a date for Merrymeet, a flower and fertility festival in early spring!

Famine
[CW: Starvation and food scarcity ]

Food rationing and inflation will have the following impact:

Grocery budgets for apped-in characters will be reduced in their efficacy.
Basic groceries will be only the most minimal of staples. You will likely go hungry if you do not find a way to supplement this.
Bountiful groceries will be reduced to the amount of food normally contained in basic.
Lavish groceries will not be available at all.
Your grocery choices from Activity Check are not able to be modified for this month unless otherwise stated.

Bonuses and Discounts associated with the Farmer and Fisherman jobs are also reduced.
Level 1 bonuses will be reduced to standard, which is to say how they would function for a non-Farmer/Fisherman character during a normal, pre-famine month. (ex. Whereas normally a Level 1 Farmer would get free Basic groceries, they will now have to pay the 50 Brass, but do not have the efficacy of Basic groceries reduced as described above.)
Level 2 bonuses will be reduced to that of a Level 1 Farmer/Fisherman. (ex. Whereas a Level 2 Fisherman would normally be able to have Bountiful groceries discounted to 50 Brass, they now must pay full price for Bountiful groceries. However, they can still get Basic groceries for free and don’t suffer from the famine induced efficacy reduction for either budget.)

Oak & Iron Residents will only be able to receive bland, repetitive meals with their food vouchers consisting of simple broth, plain bread, bland potato dishes, and the like. It is enough to be fed and comfortable but it is incredibly unsatisfying. (This includes all new characters that are not apped-in.) Drinks, however, are still plentiful.

Characters who do not eat will find that their respective sources of fuel will be reduced to just barely enough to keep them functional, provided that they ration carefully. (Ex. Transformers may want to be less active. Vampires will find that victims cannot handle excessive blood loss without fainting and generally prefer to stay home.)

Characters who were present to fight the Mother Crab back in late summer and chose to can some of their crab can use it now!

Hunting, foraging, and fishing can help reduce the impact of these reductions, and people can share their food. You can absolutely die of starvation. After Merrymeet in February, food will return to normal.

Comments

"Slasher Face" Jean | Project Moon | Existing Player

[restingslasherface]

Salmon Cannon | Famine

Forgive me for what I must do:

YOU get a fish, and YOU get a fish, and YOU get a fish, and YOU get a selection of sushi rolls actually AND YOU GET A FISH -

Longing | Docks/Seaweed Farm

Jean has been ordered to take leave from Mipha's Grace, to more effectually organize the local defense and because Zelda has wisely and secretly determined that Jean will get more sleep and rest on land with the blizzards and the Weather sometimes knocking out the Aurora, but they miss the ship. You might find them on the docks jumping up to greet fresh arrivals, fishing with an actual fishing pole (not on any days Zelda is supposed to come back, mustn't be caught doing something that looks like work...), or just staring wistfully out into the frigid sea.

They also run a seaweed farm! Guess what doesn't stop just because of the cold?

Eepy | Oak & Iron

The house seems so empty without Zelda there. It's a strange feeling; Jean never had problems sleeping alone and now they do. Consequently they do what they often do with emotions they have no context for, and try to avoid them, staying out late at Oak & Iron with books, plans, Work(tm), or just drawing. Early in the night when people start leaving to make it home before sundown when shit is dangerous, Jean tends to laugh off reminders. They can take care of themself.

The trouble is they keep passing out at the table.

Salmon Cannon | Famine

[pineapplesalmon]

César looks surprised by the fish in his hand and then ecstatic. "You caught fish??"

By tradition I declare: damn OCs and their one-liners

[restingslasherface]

"Comrade. I'm a fisherman."

[pineapplesalmon]

César laughs. "Good thing you've caught fish, then. But this is amazing. I think I'm going to be able to make something for Magne for sure. I'm going to owe you some food in turn when I get my farm up and running."

[restingslasherface]

Jean throws a second fish from their, you see, Fish For Distribution To The Town. "Grow me coffee and everything's square, hahaha, HAHAHAH, AAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA if this town runs out of coffee no one will be safe."

[pineapplesalmon]

César has to juggle to catch it but does. "I'm saving the coffee plants by getting my own greenhouse to grow other things. I promise! I love coffee, too! Know anyone who might have something that goes good with fish? I'm willing to owe several people to get what I need."

By tradition I declare: damn OCs and their one-liners

[restingslasherface]

A package of seaweed is thrown directly at César.

Salmon Canon

[graveling]

Angel approaches Jean.

"Um, I don't need fish, I need to talk to you."

[restingslasherface]

"Would you like fish anyway, comrade?"

But Jean's listening.

[graveling]

"Yes. Probably. But also I need to tell you about a conversation I had with Mortanne about the barrier around the island, a few months ago."

Yes, months ago.

[restingslasherface]

"I'm listening!"

All ears. Attentive. Weird eyes wide. Full of hope and trust. Regale them, Comrade Angel! You surely had a good reason that you kept this to yourself!

[graveling]

“Part of undoing the barrier is discovering how to undo the barrier. The reason the goddesses don’t give us answers on that is that doing so would make it impossible to actually resolve that issue. It’s designed to concentrate evil on this island, the barrier is.”

Useful information straight from a manager!

[restingslasherface]

Jean steeples their gloved (and clawed) fingers, frowning in thought. Pop quiz, priestling: "'Evil' here to mean...?"

Salmon Cannon | Famine

[i_ink_therefore_i_ammy]

Sushi. Ammy smells fish, and then she smells sushi and then she is very suddenly there. For Sushi. Is Jean ready to see the Doggess again? Hopefully they are, because there is sushi! It's been over a month without any, and making sushi is somewhat beyond the Goodest of Dogs' capabilities. Folding things is in fact, difficult without thumbs.

The literal puppy eyes are an impressive feat, though under cut a bit by the mischievous grin.

[restingslasherface]

"...Comrade. Do you want this sushi?"

[i_ink_therefore_i_ammy]

"I haven't had sushi since coming here. None at all. Pizza is a wonderful treat but it is not, and cannot be, sushi." It smells like home. Not quite the same, but still. "So you could say that, yes." Impressively, she maintains puppy dog eyes along with the grin the whole time without giggling. "Can I have the sushi?"

[restingslasherface]

They shouldn't. They know they shouldn't. This is their co-worker; further, it is a being for whom Jean holds no small amount of fear and wariness. They should be treating Amaterasu accordingly.

They should be doing that.

But what happens is Jean throws a roll at the doggo like a little treatums, doggo wants her treatums doesn't she, jump doggo!

[i_ink_therefore_i_ammy]

Ammy does a little hop and chomps down on the sushi, tail wagging enthusiastically! Tension is best broken with doggy antics! This is why she continues with the puppy eyes, definitely, not just because more sushi.

[restingslasherface]

TWO ROLLS THIS TIME THINK FAST -

Dialogue will return after these messages from our sponsors.

Longing |[But It's Actually A Fight]| Docks

[maskedstarbunny]

Walking the shore is usually fairly soothing for Ryja. Living in Limsa, you develop either love or hatred for the beach, and she got the former. Except today, something's wrong. It sings in her bones, years and years of growing up under the Green Word. It feels like the forest is under threat, and her talent is pulling at her. Her muscles are tense and it feels like something's going to snap...

And Ryja knows what this means. There's a threat here, somewhere, which means to hurt people. Which will hurt them, unless she intervenes. Unfortunately, the threat she's Seeing is the Wolf. Which means...

She's certain when she sees Jean. And she's not doubted her talent in years. She doesn't stop to ask questions and doesn't hesitate. The Viera way, especially for the women. If an intruder encounters the village without any escort, that means they've slipped past the men and are trespassing in sacred land. Strike first and ask questions if they survive.

She makes no sound when she comes in for an attack, like a proper Viera, even if she's using her fists rather than a weapon. They might still feel the attack coming, however. Just not hear it. The mask hides her face, showing none of the emotions she feels in response to the flashes she gets of the Wolf.

This Is Plotted I Swear I'm Not Godmodding

[restingslasherface]

The vision is clear; the Wolf will rise, abandoning the fishing pole its stolen body is using. Claws will flash for Ryja's throat with hellish speed, slashing up at the limit of the small human's arms.

What actually happens is this: Jean hops into a low crouch and lashes out with a sweeping kick at Ryja's ankles before flipping over the falling rabbit so she's the one cornered against the dock with only water to run to, so fast that the untrained eye might think it's a single motion. They come up in a fighting stance, claws at the ready.

[maskedstarbunny]

Duck under the claws, back step and shov- Wait that's not how this went. Ryja finds herself missing, not just from her opponent's speed but the slash that never comes. Imagine, for a moment, you take a step up a set of stairs, and find yourself going down instead. It's not the most mind-bending experience, but you would probably miss a step, wouldn't you?

Ryja ends up flat on her ass for a moment, to a move that while executed well, her teachers in the village would laugh at the thought of being taken by. In her defense, she's back up in less than a moment, springing to her feet, fists up, ears back... Eyes narrowed in confusion but he can't see that.

Her strength lay in a steady stream of attacks, interspersed with perfect responses thanks to her talent, and so she doesn't hesitate to launch into a sequence of punches... Technically, this is a Viera technique adapted for her lack of the usual claws she might wear.

[restingslasherface]

The Wolf wants to counterattack, to slash at wrists and arms, to cut and spill blood and howl, kill, keep killing -

That's not how Ryja's opponent moves. The backs of their wrists make contact with hers in deflecting parries, striking with more force than their tiny body should contain. Each hit tells a story of lean muscle and patient training; worse, training against exactly this type of aggressive style. One exchange to halt the aggression, two to get their bearings -

The third ends in an elbow strike, stepping into Ryja and slamming into her sternum in a blow meant to knock the wind out of her. A surgeon couldn't hit the triangle of bone just under and between her breasts so cleanly.

Jean takes the momentum, kicking at the rabbit's ankle. The Wolf wants to pounce and tear her throat out with teeth, but Jean?

Jean is after the ground-and-pound.

[maskedstarbunny]

Down she goes, again. This one hurts more, just as unexpected as the first. It's not that Ryja doesn't learn, so much as... Well. You never expect a force like gravity to suddenly turn, do you? -It's possible that Jean does, considering the world they come from, but still.- You're more likely to think it a fluke, a mistake you made and didn't realize.

But twice now she's missed a step, gone down when she should have gone up, and something is off. The claws could tear into her so easily, with how she's being hard-countered. She's fought killers before, and every instinct, every ounce of talent she has says that her opponent is one.

The fact that they're not throws her off. But she is still Viera, and to lose in two exchanges would be a shameful display. Her feet, strangely shaped, dig into the ground beneath her as she falls, and then she springs backwards. The edge of the dock is so close and beyond it is only ocean, and most people would fall into it after a move like this.

Nearly 50 years of tree running says otherwise. She rights herself in time to go in for another strike, this one an attempt to get behind them. She won't get away with that again. Even if they let her, her ankle wouldn't.

[restingslasherface]

"Good form," Jean murmurs as Ryja comes in, feet planted firmly. The Wolf will take the charge head-on, strike, take the hit and be hurt (indeed, Ryja's vision shows broken ribs mending themselves, painful but hardly permanent)...

Jean won't. They flow away at the last second and leap onto her back, claws closing around her throat with gentle finality. They barely indent her skin. "But not good enough to be that reckless. Down on the ground!"